16 Different types of sex acts: Can you get an STD from Oral?

What is sex?

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines sex as ‘a sexually motivated phenomenon or behavior’ [1]. That’s a rather broad definition, and for a good reason. Sex means different things to different people because pleasure is personal. For some, sex means penetrative intercourse. For others, it includes a much broader range of intimate acts such as oral sex, manual stimulation, masturbation, and more. All of these are valid, and all of them mean different things to different people [2]. The perceived idea of sex as only being intercourse is likely a symptom of a number of things, including how sex is portrayed in the media and popular culture, limited sex education, and societal stigma around sex. With a more inclusive understanding of sex in mind, let's take a look at the many different forms it can take. 

16 types of sexual activities

Let’s discuss some forms of sexual activities people engage in, solo or with a partner.

Vaginal sex

This type of penetrative sex involves putting a penis, fingers, or sometimes other objects like sex toys into the vagina. It’s common to think about the penis-in-vagina intercourse when we talk about sex. And while it’s not the only type of sex out there, it’s important you understand what vaginal sex involves.

Interestingly, only 18.4% of women reported that intercourse alone was enough for them to orgasm [3]. The clitoris is the real pleasure center when it comes to female orgasms. Since there is some distance between the clitoris and the vaginal opening, it may make it difficult for some to climax during this type of sex. However, vaginal intercourse can still be enjoyable with or without reaching climax, or it can be practiced with clitoral (or other) stimulation if that’s what works for you.

Vaginal sex requires individuals to use birth control if they want to avoid pregnancy. As with oral and anal sex, using condoms during vaginal sex is also useful for preventing the spread of STIs. You also need to make sure you clean anything that has been used for anal penetration before they go into the vagina, to avoid harmful bacteria getting in the vagina.

Oral sex

Oral sex involves using the mouth to stimulate the genitals for pleasure. Some people might like giving oral sex but don’t like receiving it, or the other way around. There is no right or wrong way to feel about oral sex. There are three different types of oral sex:

• Fellatio (otherwise known as giving head, or a blowjob): Using the mouth, lips, or teeth (sometimes with a combination of your hands) to stimulate the penis. Involves sucking and licking motions.
• Cunnilingus (known as going down, or eating out): Stimulation of the vulva and clitoris with the mouth, sometimes combined with the use of fingers. It often involves licking and sucking motions.
• Anilingus (or rimming): Using the mouth and lips to stimulate the sensitive external area around the anus.

Oral sex is a popular form of sex act. One study of older heterosexual couples in the U.S. found that 37% had engaged in oral sex in the past year [4]. While another survey that analyzed data from over 19 thousand Australians aged 19 to 59 found that 32% of people have engaged in oral sex in their most recent sexual encounter [5].

Clear communication with your partner can help you understand what you are both comfortable with when it comes to oral pleasure.

Oral sex and STIs

Oral sex is popular among people for multiple reasons. The most obvious one is because it’s pleasurable. But many choose to engage in oral sex because it offers peace of mind about pregnancy — you can’t get pregnant from oral sex as long as you make sure semen does not come into contact with the vagina or vulva. Some people also believe that engaging in oral sex protects them from sexually transmitted infections (STIs), but that’s not true. While it’s less common, you can absolutely still get an STI from oral sex if you don’t use protection [6, 7]. Use external condoms or dental dams to help prevent the spread of STIs.

Anal sex

Anal sex involves penetrating the anus with a penis, toys, or fingers. Regardless of gender, sex, or sexual orientation, this type of sex can be enjoyed by anyone. But that also doesn’t mean it’s for everyone. As with all kinds of sexual activity, it’s really important to talk about what you are and aren’t comfortable doing.

You need to use lubricants when having anal sex because the anus doesn’t naturally create its own lubrication, and this can make sex painful if you’re not prepared. While it’s not possible to get pregnant from anal sex, it is possible to get pregnant if ejaculate gets into the vagina. You should also consider using a condom to protect against STIs.

Masturbation

Did you know that solo sex is still sex? You don’t need anyone else to be present to validate your own sexual experience. It can also be a useful way to discover your own preferences in a safe space without fear of being judged, and we can’t stress enough that you should never feel ashamed of masturbation.

Despite masturbation still being heavily stigmatized, it’s much more popular than you probably think. A study that looked into people’s sexual behaviors during the recent pandemic shows that 48% of respondents reported having masturbated in the past month. This study showed big differences between genders, though. While 60% of men reported that they masturbate, only 37% of women reported the same [8]. It’s important to note that the results of these types of surveys may not be entirely accurate because they rely on people self-reporting their sexual behaviors. Masturbation is still highly stigmatized, especially for women, which may lead to them choosing not to reveal whether or not they masturbate, or how often they do it.

Whether you’re single or in a relationship, masturbation can be a healthy part of anyone’s sex life. If you’re comfortable with sharing the experience with your partner, masturbation can also help you teach each other what you most enjoy, and can ultimately be a healthy part of a shared sex life. Remember, it’s also fine if you want to keep it just for you.

Manual sex (fingering and handjobs)

This type of sex involves using your hands or fingers to give sexual pleasure. It could involve rubbing the clitoris or penis, or touching the testicles, or putting fingers inside the vagina or anus.

This can be a useful way to explore what feels good, it’s also a type of sex that doesn’t lead to pregnancy (just make sure you wash your hands if you get semen on them before putting them near the vagina).

Outercourse or dry humping

Who says you have to take your clothes off to have fun? Sometimes called frottage, or dry humping, outercourse simply involves rubbing your erogenous areas together through clothing. Outercourse may sometimes also involve kissing or more intimate touching, but typically (as the name suggests) doesn’t involve any penetration.

Frottage is a safe way to see what feels good and can help you build trust and enjoy being intimate with your partner without getting fully naked.

Erogenous touching

Different sensations may feel good or bad depending on your own preferences and how you like your body to be touched. Certain areas, such as the ears, the small of the back, and the neck, can all heighten arousal when touched, depending on what you find erotic. Whether it’s part of foreplay or not, erogenous touching is a great way to get to know your body better and discover what feels good.

Using sex toys

Sex toys are more popular than ever and for good reason. Vibrators, dildos, rings, and other toys can add a new dimension to solo or partnered sex, help you discover what feels good, and make pleasure more accessible regardless of your body or experience. Some people may use sex toys regularly, while others may use them rarely or not at all. Sex toys can be a healthy addition to anyone’s sex life as long as they are used safely.

Keep your intimate objects clean to avoid infections. In some cases, you can also use condoms for added protection. Using lubricants with sex toys may make the experience more enjoyable, and it is necessary if you’re using these for anal pleasure. When choosing a lube, make sure it’s compatible with your sex toys! Water-based lubes are most often the safest option, as they’re compatible with a variety of materials, such as silicone, glass, stainless steel, and more.

Phone sex

It’s easy to get hung up on being physical, but you don’t need to be in the same room or even the same city to have sex. Whether it’s a bit of breathy aural foreplay, a virile video call, or simply some steamy sexting, phone sex isn’t just reserved for those in long-distance relationships or even those who want to practice social distancing (but it is useful).

Phone sex can also create a safe space to explore untapped fantasies, while getting dirty down the line can be a great way to strengthen communication and build trust without being physically intimate.

Roleplay

Talking about fantasies, we’re adding roleplay to this list. Whether it's paired with physical intimacy or not, stepping out of yourself and playing with different characters or scenarios can help you learn more about your own sexuality and can build an emotional connection with your partner or partners.

It’s common to experiment with power in roleplay, and you may also use props or toys to enact this. Roleplay can be a part of BDSM or fetish, such as one partner taking a dominant or submissive role during sex. Keep in mind that, as with all types of sex, clear communication is really important. While it’s a good idea to discuss what you like before and after sex, you should also know that you can stop sex at any time while it’s happening if you are not enjoying it.

Group sex

Do you know what the most popular sexual fantasy people reported? When social psychologist Dr. Justin Lehmiller surveyed over four thousand Americans on their fantasies, he found that the #1 fantasy was group sex [9]. Group sex refers to any sexual activity involving three or more people. As with all types of sex, there’s no right or wrong way to experience it, as long as everybody involved gives clear, enthusiastic consent.

Whatever the setup, communication and boundaries are just as important in group sex settings than in one-on-one sex. It’s crucial to agree on what everyone is and isn’t comfortable with beforehand and to check in throughout the experience to ensure a safe and enjoyable sex experience. Because multiple partners are involved, the risk of STIs can be higher, so you may want to use protection, get tested regularly, and agree on safer-sex practices beforehand.

BDSM sex

Can you guess the second most popular sexual fantasy people have? Based on Dr. Justin Lehmiller’s research, power, control, and rough sex, as well as a range of other BDSM activities, such as consensual non-consent [9]. BDSM (stands for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism) is an umbrella term that includes a wide spectrum of sexual practices and dynamics. At its core, BDSM is built on the foundation of consent, communication, and trust, much more explicitly than other forms of sex. Before engaging in any kink activity, you always want to discuss boundaries, establish a safe word (a word or signal that means stop, no questions asked), and agree on what will happen or won’t happen between partners. 

Remember: sometimes fantasies are just that — fantasies. You may daydream about BDSM sex and find it arousing, but it may not necessarily translate into the real world. Keep this in mind when you experiment with your sexuality: it’s okay to change your mind at any point and ask your partner to stop.

Tantric sex

Tantric sex is deeply misunderstood. It’s not necessarily about making sex last forever, hands-free orgasms, or needing to be enlightened to even try to engage in tantric sex. While Tantra is a broad set of Hindu and Buddhist traditions involving ritual, meditation, mantra, symbolism, and ideas about sacred energy, modern tantric sex usually refers to an intimacy practice inspired by those traditions [10]. At its core, it emphasizes presence, breath, awareness, connection, and the movement of energy between partners. Most importantly, it can be approached by anyone who is curious, respectful, and willing to slow down and be present.

During tantric sex, instead of rushing towards orgasm as a goal, you want to focus on slowing everything down. Try conscious breathing, eye contact, mindful touch, and being fully present with your partner in the moment. The idea is to remove the pressure to “finish” and instead leave space for more profound emotional experience.

Shower sex

Intimacy in the shower can be a fun thing to do, but one of the most important things to know going in is that water washes away natural lubrication, which can make penetrative sex uncomfortable without lube. So, consider investing in shower-proof lube (silicone-based lubes are the best option here). Safety is also worth considering. Wet surfaces are slippery! So you may want to invest in a non-slip mat if you don’t already have one to prevent any unfortunate accidents.

One thing to note is that shower sex doesn’t have to be all about penetration. A shower is a wonderful setting for other forms of intimacy, like touching, kissing, or manual stimulation. Play around and explore to find what works best for you.

Morning sex

If you’re an early riser, then morning sex can be a great way to start the day. Levels of the male sex hormone testosterone actually peak in the morning, which is why many people with penises wake up with erections [11].

Late-night sex

If you prefer to snooze in the morning or if intimacy is tricky in a busy household, then sex before bed may be your preferred way to get your rocks off. Orgasms have also been shown to help improve sleep, which is another great argument for sex at this time of the day [12]. Keep in mind that drunk people can’t give consent, so late-night hookups after lots of alcohol are something to avoid.

Get to know your body & sex life better

While this post only scratches the surface, and there are plenty more ways to explore pleasure out there, we hope it has given you some ideas if you’re curious to expand your sexual repertoire. Promoting knowledge around reproductive health is an important part of our mission here at Natural Cycles, and we believe an inclusive approach to how we talk about sex benefits everyone. Natural Cycles is only available for users aged 18+ and does not protect against STIs. Find out if it could work for you today!